Back on the Big Band Throne: Tour Notes from KL

I wanted to take a moment to document this while it’s still fresh in my head. Earlier this month, I played what might have been my first proper large-scale jazz gig in years: a big band show with the Julian Chan Jazz Orchestra and the Malaysian Philharmonic Orchestra at Dewan Filharmonik Petronas.

It felt like stepping back into a life I once knew intimately. Long rehearsals, pages of charts, setups, fills, the satisfying punch of a shout chorus landing exactly right. We even played Caravan (yes, the “Whiplash” one), and there’s a particular kind of thrill that comes with driving a band that size through those hits and accents. Nerves were definitely there, as they should be. I’ve always believed that if you feel nothing before performing, it’s time to take a hard look at what you’re doing.

This one was special for a few reasons. First, the MPO's orchestral strings and percussion added a whole new dimension. Some of the repertoire moved into this concert-jazz hybrid territory, and that challenged me in the best way. As someone who’s studied both percussion and drum set, I found myself constantly toggling between those mindsets: touch, phrasing, tone, discipline. It reminded me how much I love the interplay between precision and freedom.

And the musicians were absolute class acts, every single one. Julian Chan (saxes/woodwinds), of course, is a fellow Queens College alum and one of the most generous bandleaders I’ve ever worked with. I connected with fellow Berklee alumni Az Samad (guitar) and Rozhan Razman (bass) in the rhythm section, and met legends like Michael Veerapen and Junji Delfino, people who little baby-musician me knew by name years ago, yet instantly welcomed me into their musical homes! Though it’s been years since I’ve played in a full-scale jazz concert like this, the KL scene has this warmth to it. Less cliquey, more “come, let’s play.” It would be nice if Singapore were a little more like that!

This whole thing made me reflect on balance. Over the past few years, I’ve been focused heavily on teaching, supervising, writing, and the kind of academic work that requires stillness. Somewhere along the way, performance became the afterthought; not forgotten, but quietly sidelined. Lately, I’ve been trimming what doesn’t align anymore, and, as if on cue, the universe decided to hand me two regular gig offers, both reasonable, both fulfilling, both paying above market. One is a duo with a singer; the other is a trio with a singer and e-drums. The catch is that I’m on keys—my third-best instrument, maybe—but music isn’t about ranking; it’s about perspective! I think my years of composing, arranging, and bass playing help me approach the keyboard like a rhythm section player, not a pianist.

Speaking of bass, that side of my life has been alive and well, too. I’ve been doing regular work with High Notes at Brotzeit and recently a jazz bass set at Intercontinental Bugis with Vamp Productions on my trusty Fender P. What’s funny is that many of the musicians on these gigs are people I used to look up to 15 years ago. I still look up to them. The only difference is that now we share the stage as peers... which is quietly humbling in a good way.

If I had to distil what this KL tour gave me, it’s that performance isn’t a separate life from research or teaching. It’s the living, breathing lab. Everything we talk about in pedagogy exists in that moment when the baton drops and thirty musicians breathe together. I want to hold on to that in my teaching, writing, and playing going forward.

Perhaps that’s the lesson. You can step back to reset, but eventually, you must return to remind yourself that all the theory and talk only matter if you can still create music that feels alive - KL did that for me!